I was supposed to go to the Indian Consulate today to get our travel visas for our trip. (Dad, if you're reading this look away. Yes, I know you told me to do it 2 weeks ago. Yes, yes, I realize that you've called me from India 3 times this past week to remind me to get our visas. DAD! Stop yelling! We'll get the damn visas soon.)
Anyway,the applications were filled out and I thought I would call the consulate to confirm the procedure and was treated to the following conversation:
man: hello (even his tone makes it sound like he can't be bothered)
me: oh, hello...is this the Indian Consulate?
man: (sounding annoyed) yes. what is it?
me: I wanted to verify that I can drop off my family's passports in the morning along with our visa applications and our visas will be ready for pick-up at 4pm.
man: yes...Perhaps
me: umm...Perhaps? Could you be a little more specific?
man: ma'am if there are many people than you must come back another day.
me: Another day? Meaning I drop it off today and pick it up on another day?
man: yes, another day.
me: Well sir, could you offer me some guidance on how many days it would take?
man: I don't know. 1 or 5 days perhaps. Depends. Are you American?
me: I have an American passport but I was born in India. I'll be bringing in passports for my husband and children.
man: You don't sound Indian. Are they Indian?
me: (WTF??) We all have American passports. They were all born in the U.S. My husband is American.
man: But he is Indian?
me: No, he's American..
man: Yes, he has a US passport but he is Indian, right?
me: NO, he has a US passport AND he is American..
man: ma'am! He is Indian but born in the US, no?
me: NO! He is white...like rice. My husband is as white as rice! (I'm practically yelling at this point)
man: Oh. Yes, drop the passports off with the applications but you may have to pick it up another day.
me: Thank you! (click)
So J was on her way to pick me up when Chutney starts barking/yelping/crying from his kennel. This isn't unusual as the dog is a big whiner. I continue typing away at my desk when all of a sudden I get a horrible smell. As I walk to the basement I already know what it is. Shit. Chutney had an upset tummy and went all over his kennel. I spent the next 2 hours cursing the dog and cleaning up the mess. What's worse is one of my projects is being audited which leads to a constant stream of stressful calls. By the time J arrived (an hour late I may add) to pick me up, I was in no mood to go to the consulate. Instead, she convinced me to go for sushi and deal with the visa next week. (I'm out of town the rest of the week).
D called and asked what's for dinner. If looks could kill I'd be a widow right now.